I don’t think I love him, I think that I like that he loves me.
I haven’t been able to sleep, I feel it deep inside of me. A love budding,one which might destroy or free me. For now , I don’t know how the story ends, but I hope even if I cry, the scares are not deeper than I allow.
The Genesis
I met him at work. I meet a lot of people at work, but most time they don’t matter. He didn’t matter, till he is starting to.
I thought he was cute, but at the time we met , I wasn’t looking for anything serious. I tend to do that a lot, “not looking for something serious”.
Sometimes I think to myself, if I wasn’t in love with Jesus and a follower of him, I would have been one of those people who might have been categorized as a “…” . I love to experience people, but most times I don’t know how to commit. And that is why I didn’t even open up to the idea of dating for a long time.
I don’t easily like people (mostly because not a lot of people catches my fancy) i have a peculiar view of beauty. But most importantly, I’m attracted to people’s mind.
I don’t like his mind ,this man.Let’s call him Zeus. But there was something about him that still wanted him around as a friend.So I told him that.
I missed a crucial part of the story,forgive me. Prior to him talking to me , I knew it was going to happen ,I saw it. And that was the only reason I started talking to him.
The Process
I think I see myself in him. I see him,and that’s the problem.
He has a great sense of humor! He gets my jokes! Not a lot of people get my jokes.
He can be very sweet, but also nonchalant-partly because I shut him down anytime he brings up anything to do with liking him.
I can be very brutal when it comes to dating. If there is one thing I know how to do well,it’s to leave. But for some reason, I just see him and want him to stick around even if it’s just for the friendship.
I’ve met a number of people while still talking to Zeus. My personal favorite is… let’s call him Romeo .
He is a proper lover boy. He is cute , smart and working hard on being a Web developer.
I remember telling him one night that I was going to get a tattoo, and he said “ no you will not” in a calm voice that was almost seductive . I told him I would,and he replied “okay” in way you would tell a child you desperately want to get off a swing you would come back, but you know you won’t.
My problem with him was that he wanted me to fall in love , but I have never done that. Instead I prefer to walk into love. To hold my brains and clutch my heart, fully aware as I take the first step.
I think that was what I enjoyed about Zeus, he never pushed me. He just kept playing the game no matter what card I served him.
Conclusion
I don’t think I love Zeus, but I think he could grow on me. But I still find my heart almost pulsating at the thought of not getting a quick text from him.
I can almost picture braiding his hair while we watch a late night show in our living room (no kids of course,at least not yet).
I have never thought about that,ever! I’m too logical for that. Not even with … let’s call him Mr.Perfect , who was as his name implies almost too perfect on paper .
I’m going to rest my head now,I won’t dream Of him because I don’t want to. But I might be looking forward eagerly to his text when I wake up.
2024 dating recap
Sort of talked to-10 ish
Liked-3
Going into 2025 with -1
Just wanted to share
I’m soul sister. Welcome to my community,you can rest her.
Clap for this as much as you can.
Thank you.
